Who? what? where?

Women Call the Shots

When it comes to having a casual encounter, it’s not much of a secret that women are in control of the situation. It’s not that there are too many men, but it’s just that there is too many men with a high demand for hot women. This makes dating online and casual sex in general, much more of a female dominated game. Women have what guys want, and what guys have, women just don’t want as bad as guys want to give it to them. This makes the easily available and overly abundant male sex almost worthless, which in turn gives women most of the power when having a casual encounter. Although there is the perception that sex is an intimate and personal encounter between two (or sometimes more) people, and that the power dynamics between those people can change depending on the relationship, if you consider sex on a societal scale, it is very clear that it is a female dominated market. Men are desperate to get some, and women are hesitant to put out, which means that women get to call the shots when they decide who gets what.

Women Are In Control – It’s Simple Economics

If you consider sex similar to economics, it becomes even more clear that women are the ones in control of having a casual encounter. The value of men’s sex is far lower than that of women’s. Not only are there too many men eager to give it away for anything, and due to the high demand for women’s sex, it drives up the value of their sex. This forces men to essentially bring other components of value to the women in order to ‘purchase’ their sex in some way. This may come in the form of other social exchanges such as love, commitment, time, attention, or anything else that a woman might desire at the time. The man must reach the value of a woman’s sex through other means as their own sex is comparably worthless.

What Makes Women’s Sex More Valuable When Having A Casual Encounter

Women’s sex is much more valuable than that of men because men engage in sex with a minimal risk compared to women. Sexual pleasure is pretty much guaranteed for men, and the more women that the sleep with, the better their chances are at producing more offspring. In addition, they hold none of the risk of childbirth. This means that for men, there is very little risk in having sex and that the benefits far outway any negative repercussions. However for women, this is very much the opposite. A woman’s pleasure during sex is not necessarily guaranteed, and having sex with many men does not increase her chance of having more children as she is physically capable of only carrying one child at a time. She also carries all of the risk of childbirth including complications that could even result in death. This makes it much more riskier for a woman to have sex, and therefore drives up the value of her consent. This perceived value is the main component for keeping women in control of having a casual encounter, and is what keeps men chasing after it.

Men’s High Demand Keeps Women in Control

Nearly across the board, men hold a higher demand for sex than women. Although there is always an exception to the case, men are almost always the ones who are seeking more sex than what they are getting. They are the main consumers of things like pornography and prostitution, and are much more likely have higher rates of masturbation and sexual fantasies. This comes down to something known as the ‘principle of least interest’. Due to men’s high demand, and women’s relative disinterest, women remain in control of the situation when having a casual encounter. This puts men at a severe disadvantage in the negotiation for sex, and means that they are the ones that need to put in the work to get what they want. Part of this fact probably also comes from the historical context of the patriarchy. While men remained in control of most of the worldly resources, women were still able to leverage sex in order to get what they want. This is a practice that has manifested itself into our modern lives, and creates the social expectations that are common in the dating game. Although modern gender roles are changing, as long as too many men are desperate for sex, women are in control of the game when it comes to having a casual encounter.